Warning: Full Frontal Lewdity

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Bullshit probably made up by some skinny bitch



I just read some "inspiration" on some getting fit web site.  It's the biggest piece of crap I've heard, without the involvement of Fox news, in a long time.

"If you eat what you've always eaten, you will weigh the same as you've always weighed"

Hold on a second - Bwaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahah!

Okay now that we are done laughing,  let me rebut 

Back when I was a senior in high school I was 17, 5 foot 3 1/2 and weighed 100-105 lbs depending on the week.  Now can you guess which of those things has not changed?  Ding Ding Ding, give that girl a case of turtle wax, Yes I am still 5 foot 3 1/2 but I am 20 years older and many pounds heavier.  And the kicker, for the most part I eat much healthier then I did years ago.  

Back in the early 90s I really don't remember eating.  Food was, as it should be, sustenance.  Unless it was a holiday or a special date out I really didn't think much about what I was putting in my mouth (Kathleen hold that comment  ;o  ) Here is what I remember as a typical day - 

Breakfast - Cereal or Instant Oatmeal
Lunch - Soft pretzel w/mustard and a Coke (pure goodness not diet)  Often I would add, some  pickles from the school salad bar (of course I didn't eat the salad - duh!) and/or a pack of cupcakes
After school snack - I was a busy girl and would often eat a lot of junk from vending machines or 7-11.  So I am guessing Doritos and M&Ms and more Coke or Mt. Dew would be a typical day
Dinner - ??? This is the part I do not remember.  I know my parents cooked and sometimes I cooked for the family.  Let's say I ate chicken, wild rice and green beans.  Pro. drank milk or juice or yes, more soda
Snack/Dessert - Always dessert in my house.  Candy bars or cookies or brownies.  Something with more sugar and bad carbs. 

Quick note - I was 17 while I was eating this crap, my parents really had little to do with my eating habits at this point.  I know as a younger child I always ate more fruit and veggies.

Let us compare a typical day from years ago to a typical day now

Breakfast - Cereal or Oatmeal and coffee (nectar or the gods) 
snack - handful of nuts, fruit or nothing 
Lunch- Whatever my kids are eating typically - Today it's chicken noodle soup, grapes and bell pepper strips.  I added in a few extra cucumbers for me.  Water (also a lot more water through the day, maybe not 8 cups but 5 or 6) 
Snack - ??? Something, hopefuly not total crap, granola bar, yogurt ?? I admit to eating while I make dinner, popping carrots and I chop.  And coffee to get me thru the 4pm energy slump.
Dinner - Pork Chop, roasted broccoli, salad  Water or Diet Soda or some other low cal drink
After my kids are in bed a little dark chocolate and.or a glass of wine (more then a glass on weekends) 

This is not to say I don't give into cravings because I do.  I loves me a donut.  Just not every day. And come on I get vegetables and drink water for goodness sake. 

So what has changed?  I guess it is possible that I consume more calories now.  But with all the empty calories I used to consume I don't know.  I would also say I  excersise about the same amount.

I think it all comes down to Age, metabolism and Babies.  With each kid I gained a fuckton of weight and held onto a few pounds each time.  Now I  really do not mean to get into my weight loss woes of the past 2 + years that is for another post but I will say after my 3rd son was born the fat really hit the fan.  I can't seem to loss much weight no matter what.  I could eat celery all day long or I could eat cake all day long, it really doesn't matter.  And the more kids I have had the less time I have for myself to think only about myself.   I think I have to move even more as my metabolism is shot. Then again people think that metabolism theory is crap too.  Maybe it's genetic.  Maybe I am fated to be a pear like great great aunt Buela.  Who knows?
Like I said my current weigh journey is for another time but for now here is what I do know. To the the idiot who make the comment about eating what ever you've always eating -I think you are full of crap.   If we ever meet I've got a swift kick to your, I'm sure tiny, ass coming for you.  Of course I'll have to catch you  first, and when I do I'll sit on you to be sure you can't get away.

Now get up and dance and jiggle - Big Fat Mamas are back in style



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